17 December, 2008

I've A Lumberjacket And I'm Ok

Maybe I'm being paranoid, but sometimes it seems like mX staff are writing these to try and bait me. Still, on with the show.

You might think I'm about to make fun of bogans or alcoholics or the dentally impaired, but you'd be wrong. I'd just like to point something out to anyone trying to find love through HLAY; anyone that eagerly scours the entries every day hoping to get a mention. A physically abusive mother with three front teeth who is drunk at 10 in the morning is the leading candidate for transport romance. Are you sure that's something you want to be a part of?

10 December, 2008

Please Tell Me You Didn't Sit On His Lap

Harley, I think maybe it's time to tell you the truth. You know how all those kids at school, and then everyone at uni, and now everyone at your job keeps telling you that Santa's not real? Well, they're right. I know we probably should have told you sooner, rather than letting you grow into a 29-year-old with a warped sense of reality, but that's all in the past now. Merry Christmas.

Also, I recommend you watch Silent Night, Deadly Night as a cautionary tale against anyone dressed as Santa.